We all know that dating is hard (and the pandemic’s not making things easier) and nearly everyone has at least one truly awful horror story of a date they like to tell others to warn them of what’s out there. However, even some of our worst experiences can pale in comparison when we realize what stories are out there on the internet.

We’ve waded knee-deep through broken dreams, dashed expectations, and all-around romantic ickiness to bring you these stories of the worst dates ever that people shared on r/AskReddit here, here, and elsewhere. Scroll down to read about them. While some are absolutely creepy, others have a tinge of dark humor to them. When you’re done reading, you might want to take a gander at Bored Panda’s previous article about the worst first dates ever, right over here.

I reached out to relationship expert Dan Bacon, the founder of The Modern Man, for advice on dating and why it’s actually vital to keep going on dates if we want to see success in our relationships. He explained to Bored Panda that just because we’re in a long-term relationship, it doesn’t automatically make all of our dates great. Or that they happen at all. Scroll down to have a read, dear Pandas.

#1

First date with a guy I met on a dating app. I sat down and he immediately was like "Oh yes, you are hotter than your pictures and you're my girlfriend now." Came on real strong. I chalked it up to keenness at first (maybe a weird sense of humour?) and figured I'd at least stick around for a drink or two, feel it out. Even offered to buy the first round, partly as an excuse to get away from the table for a second. I made some unrelated comment to the bartender that made him laugh, and when I got back to the table, dude LOST HIS S**T. Wanted to know what I said, whether I thought the bartender was good-looking... Had somehow gotten insta-jealous of this bartender five minutes after meeting me. There was no second drink.

Image credits: murkymouse

#2

Met a girl on Craigslist (this was a long time ago obviously). After a few messages we set up a date at a bar downtown. I show up and she's already there with a guy friend. No biggie I'm thinking, she's just playing it safe. They are at a two person table and the place is packed. They already have drinks so I grab one for myself and put it on my tab. Her and her friend proceed to ignore me. Like I say something and neither one acknowledges anything unless I ask a direct question. Even then I get one word answers with attitude. So I finish my beer pay my bill and leave without saying a word. Later I get a barrage of messages about how I'm a [jerk] for sticking them with their own tab.

Image credits: CaptnSave-A-Ho

#3

I agreed to go on a date with an older coworker from my first job at a supermarket, I was 20 he was 27. He took me to lunch and didn’t let me order for myself; when the waitress came to ask what I wanted to drink he cut me off and placed both my drink and food order (I hadn’t even glanced at the menu yet). He proceeded by saying I needed to meet his mom and brother soon and how we should get married and eventually have kids. Mind you he didn’t know a single thing about me.. I quit shortly after that and he would message me on social media every now and then saying things like my then boyfriend didn’t deserve me until I blocked him everywhere.

Image credits: BeeRivers

Relationship expert Dan, who created The Modern Man project to help guide people in the dating world, believes that it’s very important for the health of any relationship to keep going on dates, no matter how long you’ve been dating.

He explained to Bored Panda that dating, in essence, helps keep partners attracted to each other. Naturally, when the date goes well. Unfortunately, many couples simply forget about dating when they’ve been together for years and years. This is a mistake that could cost you the relationship and plunge you back into the messy world of (online and traditional) dating as you can see in the r/AskReddit posts.

#4

Well.. I had a crush on this guy in high school and my friend kept urging me to talk to him. I got the nerve to and apparently he liked me too, or so I thought. We talked often and exchanged notes in the hallway. He asked me to homecoming and I said yes. I was so excited. Bought a new dress and everything!! Got to the football game and met up with my friend. I finally saw my crush and told him I was gonna go sit with him for the game. He’s like “no, you can’t”. I’m like “why?” Him: “Because I’m with my girlfriend!” I was devastated and embarrassed to say the least. Didn’t stay for the rest of game or homecoming. Called my dad and he picked me up in front of the school where I was sitting all by myself.

Image credits: No_Significance2592

#5

I took a shot at asking this girl out from down the hall in my apartment. She says yes and we go out to dinner. Right off the bat we learn that we have a mutual connection, a coworker of mine was her best friend - ok, cool.
I order up a martini, she awkwardly orders a rum and coke. It was at that point I realized she either doesn't drink often, or she drinks way too often (who orders a rum an coke to go with dinner?). Anyways, two drinks in she starts telling me how she has conversations with her dead dog and how her dead father sends her text messages. Then, she informs me that she is heavily medicated and those meds shouldn't be mixed with alcohol. Another 10 mins later after I try to get her to drink some water, she is trying to pick food from the other tables plates and her boob is hanging out. Straight dangling. I try to help her out of the restaurant to get her home, some chads think I'm trying to take advantage of her so now I'm dealing with that. She ends up calling her friend and my coworker while I'm busy getting her a cab and tells my coworker that I got her drunk while she was on her meds (she is getting emotional now that she realizes I'm sending her home). Before she leaves she pukes down the back side of my shirt. I just bought that shirt that day.

I ended up meeting my now wife at the bar that night while I was trying to drink off the memories of what just occured. She thought it was weird that I had on a white undershirt, my pants were wet and I was holding a button down shirt. To this day she still laughs at the stupid situations I get into.

Image credits: FunkSiren

#6

My wife wanted to plan our 13th wedding anniversary. I was excited because usually I plan it. She bought us some new disc golf discs and after a quick supper we went to play. We hadn't played in forever. We were laughing and I had a great time.

She served me with divorce papers and told me that date was a test to see if she still had feelings for me. I also learned that she was having an affair that started well before our anniversary.

Image credits: rmorlock

The expert explained to Bored Panda that couples can feel overwhelmed with work, family life, and other commitments. However, they must do their best to spend time with one another.

“If there is no time for dates, a couple simply needs to focus on making the most of the interactions they have,” he told me. “This means flirting to create sexual tension, complimenting each other more often, using humor, and being more physically affectionate where possible.”

#7

I went out for dinner and a movie with a guy. I tried to chip in money at both, but he insisted that he cover it all. At the end of the night, we're sitting in his car in the parking lot of the restaurant we had just eaten at, and he asks for a BJ saying "I mean, I bought you dinner and took you to a movie, it's the least you can do".

Thankfully I lived nearby, I hopped out and walked home.

Image credits: rlw0312

#8

I've got a couple:

Meet a guy from OKCupid. He seems nice, but never stops talking. After interrupting me for the 3rd or 4th time, I finally ask him "do you want to hear anything I have to say?" He apologizes profusely, says "you're right, I'm so sorry!" and pulls out a pad of paper and a pen. He then jots notes as I'm telling him about myself and whatnot. I finally ask him what he's doing and he says "oh, I'm writing down things I want to tell you when it's my turn to talk again."

Met another guy from OKC. He knowingly used pictures that didn't accurately reflect the way he looked and kept saying "you look just like your pics!" in shock. He then told me I reminded him of his mother... Like it was a good thing.

Image credits: Breakfast27

#9

Dating app, smallish town Kingston Ontario. Go on a few boring dates. Cue story. Match with girl, she agrees to meet but there was something odd about the conversation. She was eager to meet, suspiciously eager. I get to the Starbucks and wait inside for 20 minutes past the agreed meet time. Girl texts me says she running late, asks me to stand outside so she can see me as she drives by. I look over and theres another dude standing on the sidewalk with his phone in his hand. Recognize him from the gym, ask if hes also meeting a girl, and what her name is. Turns out the girl was pulling a fast one on us both as revenge for her girlfriend who we both apparently dated once and didn’t like. So him and I went to get ice-cream together and sent her a photo of us having a great time. Wish I still had the photo!

Image credits: redsaw87

According to Dan, some people simply forget that they’re in a romantic relationship. They get stuck in the endless loop of monotony.

“Many couples fall into the trap of just existing around each other, focusing more on their phone or on watching TV, and just expecting that the other person will stick around for life,” the expert said that failing to put in the effort can result in the deterioration of the relationship.

“Eventually, one of them says, ‘We need to talk’ and says that they want to break up, or one of them cheats or lines up a new person before leaving the relationship,” he noted what the potential fallout might be.

#10

Went out with a girl I met on a dating site. We met for coffee, got our drinks, sat down…..and she forgot how to talk.

For almost an hour, I would try to start a conversation and bring up any and all topics I could think of. I tried talking about our jobs, hobbies, families, anything really. Her responses were just “Uh huh”, Oh yeah”, “That’s cool” and “Nice.”

She wasn’t looking at her cell phone, looking out the window or being distracted. Completely forgot how to have a conversation while staring at me for the hour we were at the coffee shop.

It was the shortest and longest date I’ve ever experienced. After leaving, I hit the McDonalds drive thru and had a consolation meal to put that bad date behind me.

Image credits: MHSPres

#11

I finally took a girl out I had been pining after for a long time.

She had been in a bad relationship for about two years, had a kid with the guy, and they finally broke up. I waited a few weeks, and asked her out. She agreed. I picked her up with a teddy bear holding some flowers, she loved them and put them in water immediately.

We went to a local sushi place, ate our fill and headed out for a movie. Watched the whole movie together in the theater, flirting and touching the whole time. Afterwards, we went driving around and just talked for about two hours before I took her home. We made out on her front steps for probably 20 minutes before we finally peeled ourselves away from each other. I went to bed feeling absolutely fantastic.

Woke up the next day and texted her good morning. No reply. Whatever, she had a baby. Figured she was busy. Went about my day. Finally got in Facebook during my lunch break and she was back together with her ex already. Haven't talked to her since.

Image credits: MorpheusPrimed

#12

My rule was first time meeting someone was usually at a coffee shop or something similar. Some intimate setting to get to know the person better.

Met a girl on Tinder. She seemed very nice and somehow we had a good bit in common, other than she was religious while I am not. She never brought it up in conversation so I didnt think much of it.

Decided to meet her at a Starbucks halfway between our homes. She was nice, but seemed nervous. Thought it was the first date nerves or something. Probably about 15 minutes into talking, another dude who was sitting a few tables near us comes to sit down right next to her. He pulls out a pamphlet with the words like Jesus and Are you lost? written across the top. I'm super confused at this point. I tell the guy "No thanks" and that we didn't have time to hear about it. SHE then begins to tell me that this was her friend and that they wanted to talk to me about where I was in life and how Jesus can help. I think she mentioned something about how today's youth is being corrupted by online dating and how we're straying from God's light. Realized then that I was in a religious interventiom. I was pretty freaked out. I think all I said was something to the effect of "This is [messed] up," then stood up and left. She texted me later to tell me that she was there for me when I was ready to hear God's word.

Image credits: [deleted]

“If you truly love the person you are in a relationship or marriage with, put in a little bit of effort to understand how to have a mutually happy, in love, and attracted relationship and then do it, rather than just letting the relationship die and then getting dumped at some point in future,” he urged all couples to fight for their loved ones, instead of leaving things up to chance.

#13

Went on a date with a guy who seemed really cool. He used to race bikes until he landed on his head after attempting a jump.

During the date he:

Told everyone we were on a date. Everyone.

Told me he wanted to kill his ex roommates.

Asked the waitress to make the date more romantic, so she brought out a giant ice cream sundae (meant for 2 people to share). He ate it all by himself, and spilled ice cream all over himself.

Bragged about beating the world record for the jump on which he landed on his head.

Kept asking me if I was a gold digger, because he makes tons of money and needs to protect himself.

Demanded separate bills (no big deal).

All 4 of his credit cards were declined. Asked me if I didn't mind paying and he would get it next time. (not that there would BE a next time ever)

Told everyone that the date went "splendidly".

Gave me stickers to his welding company as a thank you for paying since his credit cards must have some kind of error.

Image credits: ismelllikecoconuts

#14

I went on an online date with this guy when I first moved back home from college...

We met up and I have a habit of telling my parent "i'm going out, I'll be back later" w/o specifics, etc. Anyway, this time, she says "just be careful and if he can't drive, get out the car."

We were en route to our first destination and it was closed. So, he asked me where I wanted to go and I said, "Hooters and bowling." I know, keep it classy right here.

His driving was so reckless... I mean, REALLY bad. Anyway, we ended up going across town because he wanted to take me to this one place. By this time I've determined I'm not into him and I want out, so I just go along with it, maybe we can be friends, right?

His breaks give out and we end up having an accident. We ran into the back of a truck pretty hard and I jerk forward, glasses flying off. After the smoke settles, when I'm nervous, I start laughing. He asks if I'm okay, I said sure and I'm looking for my glasses and he goes, "oh this is bad, really bad." So, I said "Why? No insurance?" He says, No, I have a warrant for my arrest He gets out the car and runs. As he's running into the sunset, he's yelling back at me "i'm really sorry, I can't afford to go to jail again."

The person we hit, leaves. So, I'm the only one there and police show up. I had to call my parent to come pick me up because I have no friends in the area and of course, I gave the cops his info. I knew I wasn't going to talk to him again. The police gave me a ride to a gas station across the street as I was waiting for someone to pick me up. I leaned back, took a picture in the cop car, posted it on Facebook and tagged him in the picture. Somewhere in between the running he found time to get on Facebook and block me.

Bad part about not just the accident, I didn't even get a chance to enjoy Hooters and wings.

Image credits: filmpster

#15

It was with a guy who had recently been broken up with. We were already friends so we went to his house to watch a movie/play video games. Right off the bat he lays on the couch goes on his phone, I have nowhere to sit and end up on the floor. He then opens his exes facebook page and proceeds to show me pictures of her. When he was done doing that he fell asleep. I had didn't have a car at the time so I called a ride and played his Xbox while I waited.

Did not have a second date.

Image credits: caterpillar2197

#16

I was on a first date with a girl I had met through doing some community theatre. We'd gone to the movies to see "Cloudy With A Chance Of Meatballs." Before the movie, we were chatting and slowly realizing that it definitely wasn't meant to work out. We just had too many conflicting interests and opinions. It made the experience incredibly uncomfortable, especially because we started lightly arguing over things like politics and religion. I was young and I was an idiot.

Anywho, before the movie started I texted another friend of mine to tell her (the friend) how terribly the date was going. And then I heard that fateful sound. Immediately after clicking "send" on my phone, my date's phone chimed. She pulled it out of her purse and read whatever text had come in. She then slowly turned to me and asked...

"Did you MEAN to send that to me?"

I immediately realized and explained that I had just opened up whatever the most recent message in my inbox was and replied to that, with the intention of texting my friend. Or perhaps I'd clicked the wrong name in my contacts list (they both were the only names beginning with M in my phone.) Needless to say, she was pretty upset.

I explained that, despite our differences I really enjoyed her company. I really did, because she was brilliant and beautiful. Certainly out of my league. So we continued the date as friends which was more awkward than we had anticipated.

After the movie, we went our separate ways. When I got back to my apartment, I texted that same friend again about how that date was incredibly uncomfortable and I doubted that there would be a follow up.

My phone chimes.

"You sent it to me again."

Image credits: Rocktopus_PhD

#17

Tinder date. She looked nothing like her picture while not ugly just completely different. Picked the worst restaurant in town which I looked past because everyone has different taste. we came back to my house and complained about not showing affection or touching her so I started touching her and then got mad about ohhh wanting a hook up which I didn’t, but the final straw was when she decided she didn’t like my house which I had just bought and was Proud of. she immediately wanted to go to home depot to buy stuff to start remodeling. It was by far my worst and weirdest date and I hope she found a house to remodel.

Image credits: ahe_243

#18

She started talking about her lifestory from childhood to that day. Year by year.. with every single traumatic story and emotions. That was our first ever date and she didn’t even let me speak for that duration. I was like “oh okay she is now talking about highschool 6 more years left, hold tight”

Image credits: Paranoides

#19

Showing her a video on my phone and my boy texts me "did you f**k her yet" and it pops up on the screen.

Image credits: FacistStaleHooker

#20

Years back, in my early twenties, I met this girl online. She seemed nice, geeky, into a lot of the same nerd stuff I was. Cute in her photos too. She dodged me several times about going on an actual date, but finally we set something up. She wanted me to come to her house so she could make dinner, watch a movie; we were both introverts, so that's fine by me.

She said she lived in Houston, but it was actually over an hour outside of it (Which isn't crazy because Houston is yuuuuge). When I got to her 'house' it was actually a trailer in the middle of the woods on a wooded lot full of trash. Turns out they didn't have a trash service, so she basically just threw it outside. I saw cats everywhere, but... It was cats and giant freaking rats.

Still, I'd driven an hour plus, and I was already there, so I climbed up the decrepit deck and knocked on the door. When she opened it, the smell of cat urine poured out of the trailer and invaded my nostrils just as roughly as the Nazis did France.

I get inside.. Cats everywhere. Orange vats, brown cats. Skinny cats, fat cats. Old cats, young cats. Cats everywhere. I knew she lived with her mom, and I got to meet her. She was huge, like.. HUGE. I don't know how the trailer floor held up, and when she got close to me, she smelled like straight up ammonia.

The mom was "cooking dinner" for us, which was like precooked frozen stuff. The girl drug me to her room and attacked me like an animal in heat. I begged off to go to the restroom and the room was covered in cat [poop] and litter. Just box after box, the shower and everything. I couldn't do it.

I went and told her Id forgotten the flowers in my car and drove the f**k away as fast as I could.

Image credits: gheistling

#21

Uh…

My best friend set me up on a blind date straight after my divorce. I was 22(yes, 22 and divorced), and she told me I “needed a good man”. She told me all about how this guy had a good job and he was sooo nice blah, blah, blah. She would NOT tell me how old he was, and would only send me blurry pictures. I felt pressured so I went.

He was no where near as attractive as she had made him out to be, and much, much older than I expected. He looked at me and said, “she didn’t tell you how old I was, did she?”

Anyway, this guy proceeds to drive me around his property, which is huge and beautiful out in the country in TN. He takes me up on a mountain on a four wheeler and proceeds to try to kiss me. I, being terrified I might be murdered out here in the middle of nowhere(he had brought a gun along), let him and it was one of the worst kisses I have ever had. He then took me down off of the mountain to shoot and critiqued my form the entire time. Then he proceeded to absolutely trash his ex wife because she turned out to be a lesbian while walking me around the house they lived in and showing me all of her favorite places and telling me all the things she would do there.

He then showed me the house he was living in with his brother which was basically just a shack.

It was awful. I now tell everyone she tries to set up about this experience, and let them know not to trust her.

Image credits: NicoleanDynamite

#22

Met a girl at a country bar one night in my 20s. We were both pretty drunk but hit it off pretty good. Ended up getting her number and we agreed we’d go on a real date. Fast forward to the date, she gets in my vehicle and…… she looks almost identical to my mom. I was mortified. I was polite and we went for lunch where I found out she also had a boyfriend she “wasn’t sure if she was into”. Never talked to her again.

Image credits: SgtGo

#23

Started fine with a decent dinner. One hour later she grabs me by the neck, looks me in the eye, and says “I want you to get me pregnant.”

Feeling completely uncomfortable, I said maybe it’s best we call it a night. On the way home, she starts screaming and yelling, then undid her seatbelt and began kicking the [hell] out of me while I was driving her home.

Pulled over, called the police, they came pretty quickly and fortunately took her home. Apparently she was on some kind of drugs and they kicked in right when dinner ended.

What a night.

Image credits: MacbookPrime

#24

She ordered a steak to go, then sat quietly and waited for me to finish eating. She didn't want to answer questions, and didn't have anything she wanted to talk to me about. "see you later," she said as I dropped her off. "Not likely." I answered.

Image credits: MadWhiskeyGrin

#25

Met a lovely girl over Tinder, we really hit it off and had a great conversation, decided to meet in person for coffee the next day.

She showed up on time, looked just like her pictures - and brought her boyfriend.

Image credits: [deleted]

#26

It was a date that wasn't. I put an personal ad in the paper (this was back in the day) and agreed to meet this guy at a certain place. He took one look at me and drove away. He never said a word to me, just look at me and left. I was very upset when this happened. I guess he didn't like the way I look.

Image credits: baronesslucy

#27

I went on a Tinder date with a guy who is now in my contacts as "Donotanswer Penispic."

Prior to the date he seemed normal. We texted and talked on the phone then arranged to meet at a restaurant/bar.

He was cute but definitely bitter about something. He was from California and apparently didn't like this new city we were in. He started talking about sex and blow jobs and complaining about how uptight everyone here is about sex.

He invited the waitress to a party his company was throwing, after sending back the French fries he ordered.

I showed him a picture of my dog on my phone; he took out his phone and showed me a picture of his penis.

We walked out of the restaurant together to get our cars from the valet. My car came first and I left. He texted me later that he had my sweater (apparently I dropped it on the way out) and if I wanted to see it again I'd have to hang out with him.

RIP, sweater.

Image credits: notorepublic

#28

I was really young, probably about 15 or so. I was boy-crazy. I had a crush on every guy who even remotely expressed an interest in me, but this guy...there are no words to describe this guy.

His name was Jesse. We met through a mutual friend, and while he wasn't exactly my type, he told me he thought I was pretty and so, I wanted to give him a chance.

A couple weeks later we decide to meet up at the mall for our first official date. He was very sweet, we were holding hands, you know typical teenage bulls**t. But then he got weird. VERY weird.

We're sitting on this bench and he turns to me and stares at me right in the eyes and says "Wow, when I look at you, and I look into your eyes I feel like I'm looking into your soul." Okaaaaay. I'm fifteen and desperate for an epic love story so I just smile. He goes on "DFTBAwesome, I know this seems soon but...I think you might be my soulmate. I can't wait until the day we can get married, and have babies and live together. We're going to have such an amazing life together"

So let me recap. I'm fifteen, I'm on a FIRST DATE, and my date just essentially proposed to me.

I noped the f**k out of there and never talked to him again.

TL;DR: HEY, I JUST MET YOU. AND THIS IS CRAZY. BUT YOU'RE MY SOULMATE, PLEASE HAVE MY BABIES.

#29

I went on a date with a girl in college, cutie from my class who I had been trying to get to agree to the date for a while. So I picked her up to drive to dinner, and worth mentioning I lived in Wisconsin and it was January so like -23 outside. Turns out she was bipolar but refused to take any medication for it so she had a manic episode while we were driving, proceeded to undo her belt, open the door, leap out of the car into a snow bank and started running into the woods.

I had to chase her down and convince her to get back in the car with me before she lost her feet to frostbite. We didn't date anymore but I was able to convince her to start her meds and keep on them through all of college, she's actually a pretty successful software engineer now.

Unrelated but that is one of three times a date ended with me in a snowbank on a subzero night.

Image credits: TheShape108

#30

Met a girl through a dating site and we agreed to meet up for dinner. I learned very quickly that this girl had absolutely no sense of humor whatsoever. I don't even think she cracked a smile the entire night. The date just got more and more painful as the night went on. At one point, we were talking about online dating. She told me about a friend of hers that went out on a first date with a guy online. She said this crazy guy fell absolutely in love with her friend and said he wanted to marry her. So I said "Oh, well, I guess I shouldn't have picked up this engagement ring on the way here, then!" She just stared at me blankly and said "That's not funny."

Yes, it is. F**k you.

Image credits: LexLuthorJr

#31

When I was 16 I was willing to go on a date with any boy who was willing because I thought I was missing out on the world's greatest secret. Cue Josh.

Josh was the friend of my best friends boyfriend and we had been set up on a blind double date. We were gonna go to the movies and see that stupid Facebook movie that came out around that time. Best friends boyfriend picks us both up and then we go get Josh. Now josh has decided that he's gonna wear his best outfit for this date which happened to be a bright orange knock off jersey, jnco Jean shorts that were just above his ankles and those douche sunglasses that every s**tty person has. I knew right then and there I made a huge mistake.

He gets in the car and the first thing he says is she isn't as fat as I thought she would be man. He smiles at me and asks my weight because he'd love to bench me sometime. Lolwat. I tell him that's rude to ask a girl and he says sure babe and rolls his eyes. Whatever. we all awkward sit in the car while he makes dumb jokes about blacks and terrorists. When we finally get to the movie he decides now is a good time to tell me he wants to be a navy seal when he grows up. Cool. However that's not exactly how it goes. He tells me he wants to be a navy SEAL. he literally screams the word seal everytime he says it. Everyone is looking and he. Just. Keeps. Saying. It. At this point I want to die.

However we go and find a seat and he immediately spills his drink on me. Keeps telling me to change into his hoodie and it's dark no one will see my bra. I tell him I am fine. I look at my friend and she's making out with her bf. Great. The movie sucked but it was finally time to go home. They decide that we need taco bell so we go to eat and I decide I am not hungry and won't be eating. Josh doesn't like this and proceeds to order me a bunch of food and then expects me to pay him back. When I won't he tells me that he was hoping if ate more food I wouldn't be flat chested. I'm done talking at this point. I want to go home. Which I get not after he harasses me for my number. So I give him a fake. That is until my friend gives him my number.

He texts me constantly about how he's a werewolf inside waiting to eat me, he sends me pictures of his weight bench and tells me that's were he's gonna punch my virgin hole, sends me a picture of his dogs balls, and other creepy random s**t. Not to mention his tag was navy SEALS. I blocked him but the memory lives on forever.

#32

I told my girlfriend it would be a romantic idea to get up uber-early and watch the sunrise together, forgetting that neither of us were morning people. She disliked the idea, but wanted to encourage me to come up with other, better ones, so she agreed.

We half-consciously sat on a snow-covered bench in the dark, each trying to make sure the other stayed awake. After about a half-hour, we realized it was too cloudy. The sun had already risen and we didn't see a damn thing. We parted ways and went back to bed.

#33

A few years ago, I was going through a breakup (a s**tty one..the guy was emotionally abusive..that sorta thing), so I was super excited when this hot guy I met at work asked me out.

He picked me up and told me he really wanted to go see that Twilight movie. So, even though I'm not one of those girls that really got into the Twilight thing, I said sure, fine, lets go see it..(lol).

He didn't mention it was OPENING NIGHT for that movie, so we stood in line for an hour with a ton of teenaged squealing girls. So we're standing in line, and who turns around and makes eye contact with me? My abusive ex-boyfriends b**** sister (who I never liked to begin with, even before the relationship went bad).

We finally get in the theater, get our seats, and who sits RIGHT f**king next to me? Yup, the b**** sister...literally sharing an armrest with the twat.

So, I sit through the movie being bored (I'm not into Twilight..I'm just not), pissed/nervous (sitting next to the b**** sister), and annoyed (because every time the werewolf guy took his shirt off, the girls in the theater would yell "woooOoOO"..).

So when we finally frickin leave, we go back to his place for some drinks. One thing leads to another and he asks me to spend the night. I agreed, even though I didn't really feel like staying there, but I didn't want to drive after drinking. Let me also note that this guy was HORRIBLE in bed. WORST SEX EVER. He was TERRIBLE! And in the morning before he went to work he said "I want you to be here when I get back."

Me: "Well, ok.. We can hang out again, but I want to go home and shower and whatnot..."

Him: "No, don't leave, please? I really want you to be here."

Me: "Ok, ok, I'll stay I guess.." His begging gave me the creepiest vibe at this point...

I wait 10 minutes after he leaves and I bounced and never looked back.

And now he's in jail awaiting trial for murder in LA. It was all over the news a few months ago.

#34

We spent most of the date going shopping for clothes for another date she had later that week.

It's kinda funny seeing as how she was the one that asked me out.

#35

Pulled out her phone and started playing clash of clans.

Image credits: OpenShut

#36

Well, I gave this answer on a different topic, but it ties in with this.

We were out on a date, we had been seeing each other for a while, close to a year maybe. She gets a phone call. Suddenly she looks destroyed. Her fiance had just died in a motorcycle accident.

#37

Came out from a movie, late at night, and date's Camaro was stolen. Apparently, he called his WIFE (that I did not know he had) and let her know where he was and what happened. She showed up and realized he was on a date! She started chasing ME around the parking lot telling me she was going to kill me. Saved by the cops who showed up just in time to take the auto theft report.

#38

When I was 17 I took a girl out on a Date to the movies.We ordered tickets but I barely had enough money to cover it.We then proceeded inside where she was nice enough to buy things..Specifically nachos/cheese..well I managed to sideswipe and got cheese all over her dress so I panicked and started cleaning it off with napkins which was awkward so That was great.Then we managed to exchange items and somehow I wound up holding the soda...When we were looking for seats I accidentally bumping into her and spilled soda all over the floor mountain dew to be exact.........Its not done.I then had some massive exponential growth of gas and farted like s**t really loud during the movie and (at that point I wanted to drown myself in the nearest canal)...So she had to be home earlier than expected so we couldn't finish the movie.On the way to drop her off home I crashed into a tree and totaled my car... best night of my life.

#39

Went on a blind date with a lady who wouldn't stop picking at her scabs. Just made a pile out of them on the restaurant table. I excused myself to use the washroom and when I came back my soup was there but the pile of scabs wasn't. No I didn't eat the soup.

#40

Not necessarily a date but a person I was dating invited me to his parent's house for the afternoon. He wanted to introduce me to them and show me the house he grew up in. I thought it was super sweet and had no problems going. He was also in the middle of moving and needed to pick up a few things, so it really didn't seem that unusual.

Yeah, we got there and it was awful. His entire family was there. They traveled from hours away too. This was not just meeting the parents, it was meeting the ENTIRE family. Even worse? At some point, this jackass told his parents that he had proposed. We had been dating TWO months.

I spent the entire afternoon dumbfounded and just playing along. We were two hours from home and I had no cell service, no way to leave at all. We ended up spending the afternoon brainstorming wedding ideas and planning an Alaskan honeymoon that his parents planned to gift us. His brother even called to say congratulations!

We drove back to his apartment in silence. When we got there, I got in my car and left, didn't even bother grabbing my stuff. Weirdest experience ever. I have no idea how he broke it to his parents that we weren't getting married.

#41

It was a double date. She was more interested talking to the other girl throughout the whole thing. Found out later from the other guy that his girl cheated on him with my date.

#42

When i was about 15 i took a girl to see 'The boy in the striped pajamas' without really knowing what the film was about.

Nothing sets the tone like the holocaust.

#43

Picnic literally on the Trail of Tears.

Seriously. We were both in high school and I didn't have the heart to tell him I had no interest in him. His grandmother picked me up and drove us. He put the quilt down right next to the trail marker and proceeded to try to kiss me/tell me about "our future" for the next hour while tourists passed and very quietly read the historical markers...

#44

Back in college I was invited to an ice rink with a girl I liked and some of her friends. I did not know how to ice skate and I did not pick it up very quickly but I wanted to try and impress her somehow. Well I hugged the wall the whole time and made a fool of myself. The highlight was when I saw a flash of light as I fell in front of a group of people. Turns out I had fallen right at the moment someone took a picture so my failure was immortalized forever. She took me back to my apartment and ended the relationship before it began.

On a lighter note, the woman who is now my wife was at that ice rink on that night. We didn't realize we were there the same time until a year or two into our relationship and she exclaimed "You were that guy who couldn't ice skate! Yeah, she didn't seem that into you."

#45

Gay guy here. Went on a date with a guy who seemed and looked pretty nice. He suggested we go to this showing of Rushmore that was part of some week-long Wes Anderson celebration. Now I'm impressed. Not only does he love Wes Anderson films - he's managed to find a Wes Anderson festival in my city - stuff like this isn't that common. I'm excited and think onto a winner. And then the date started.

Ever met one of those really negative people who just enjoy s**tting on everything they don't personally enjoy? Yeah he was one of those. After winning the seat raffle, he tosses the prize to me as if it was a bag of s**t (it was in fact a poster and free Wes Anderson dvd) because he "can't stand this director"...well I hate to break it to you buddy, but um...

Then, added to his general asshattery, he begins to badmouth people he worked with. I get it, we all work with a few nutjobs, but telling me that someone I've never met needs to "die in a diabetic coma" and that you were happy another woman left because you "hated the fat c**t" isn't really the way to go.

Aaaaaaand then he began to be transphobic. Look pal, we're in this LGBT thing together right? How about we stop calling trans people "it" because you think it's funny? Also, what makes you think I don't have trans friends?

Then the movie started. That's right folks, he managed to pack this much nope into the time between walking in and the lights going off. Honestly, if I'd seen Rushmore before, I'd have walked out. But I hadn't and I really wanted to watch it.

The date ended pretty shortly after the movie did. I went home and reevaluated my life and how I talked about other people

#46

Went out with a girl when we were probably 13 or 14. We went to see Inception. She gets up to go to the bathroom, but doesn't come back for a long time. Eventually I go look for her, and the guy behind the concession stand looks at me and gives me the most pitying look I've ever received, and points around the corner. Where I found her making out with another guy. I should have walked out but instead I went back to my seat to watch the rest of the movie. She returned and asked me to fill her in on the last hour of INCEPTION OF ALL THE DAMN MOVIES TO MISS THE MIDDLE OF. Also, because that wasn't enough, after the movie, I wasn't sure what bus to take home, and she pointed me to the wrong bus (I don't think this was intentional, they were right next to each other) and I wound up in a part of the city I'd never been in before.

#47

1st date with a guy from the gym. Not only did he spend the dinner portion checking out the Prom girls whose dates had brought them to the same restaurant, but after he was very excited for me to meet Pedro. He was insistent that I "shake hands with Pedro". Told me how sad Pedro was that I wouldn't "shake his hand". Petulant even. Pedro was his penis. Was also my last date with St. Hillaire and his "friend" Pedro.

#48

Met her for dinner, we seemed to hit it off well in the first few minutes, until I started feeling the worst pain ever in my side. Turns out I had a kidney stone. I unfortunately had to nope out of that one very quickly. She had blocked me via text when I abruptly left dinner, so she never got the message that I ended up in the hospital.

I didn't see her for years until we ran into each other at a bar, me with a different girlfriend, her with her husband. I explained what had happened, she felt pretty bad, but hey, no long lasting harm done. I bought her and her husband a drink, chatted for a few, and left them to finish their evening together.

#49

I went out with a guy I knew for quite a while who had been begging to take me out to dinner sometime. I didn't really like him too much but I thought I would give him a chance. He insists on picking me up and paying for dinner at a pretty nice restaurant. The date begins with him showing up late to him picking me up, whatever stuff happens. In the car we are talking and I mentioned I couldn't be out very late because my sitter needed to get home by 10pm. His response was something along the lines of 'damn your ***hole baby daddy is already cock blocking me, huh? Looks like I will have to kick some ass'. Thus guy knew nothing about the situation with my daughters father and had no right to say that. We continue to dinner and eat, afterwards when it came time to pay his card was declined. So I paid, as he swore up and down that he had money in his account. He decided to check it online and then said 'ohh yeah, whoops I forgot I bought a new xbox, I'll pay you back when I can though.' Driving back to drop me off he then asks if I would like to go to a bar. I told him no and asked to be taken home to my child. He continued driving to the bar and stated 'I just want one drink, and my ex girlfriend will be there, you'll make her so jealous!' I told him if he didn't take me home immediately I was calling 911 to say I was being kidnapped.

#50

First date (I'm 22 btw) and I'd previously never been kissed. Guy I'm with asks permission for a kiss, and that's all well and good and I tell him I'd never done that before, but I give him permission to kiss me anyway. And he gives me a sweet little peck. He asks again, and I figure it would be about the same, and nope... I'm introduced to making out and heavy petting. I dont know how to handle it so I just freeze in surprise, feeling his lips sliming his way around my mouth and his tongue trying to poke through my lips. Then he takes it a step further and jams his hand between my legs trying to rub me through my jeans. I'm freaking out internally, confused and scared, because he's not stopping and I can't find my voice to make him stop.

After a couple minutes of this and him asking if I've ever been eaten out, my 9:00 alarm goes off and I say its my dad calling me to go home. He reluctantly lets me leave but not without telling me id gotten him all hot and bothered and I should help him before I go. I just politely excused myself and cried on my drive back home. Not how I pictured my first kiss.

Tl;dr: first kiss and first date ends in tears

#51

Asked her if she showered before our dates and she swore she did...it just, didn't help, I guess....we didn't last too long.

#52

Finally, a place to tell this story.

I had a very disappointing date in highschool. It was the dead of winter. Like - 40 Celsius. We had gone to a movie, and the whole thing was really awkward. She didn't really seem to want to be there, was very detached. After the movie, and the bus trip home, she admitted that the only reason she even agreed to the date with me is because my friend had turned her down a few days earlier (I wasn't aware of that at the time) That a pretty big let down and waste of time.

But I figured whatever, I'll head home, and find something else to spend time on, I'll get over it eventually. I got off the bus and just wanted to get home as soon as possible. At the bus stop there is a thigh high railing around the front of the nearby parking lot, instead of walking around it, I decided to step onto, and then over it.

The second I stepped onto it, i realized it was coated in ice. I Charlie browned the f**k out. Just flipped through the air. Lost everything in my pockets. Ripped my pants from ***hole to zipper. And then came down hard right onto the railing with my shin, fracturing it.

It's still - 40 out. I can't just lay there till help comes. So I fish around in the snow, grab my stuff, try to stuff my balls back into my pants, and stagger home.

TLDR : Its not me it's you, limped home balls in the wind.

#53

met her in a adult soccer league. Asked her to grab breakfast that weekend, she accepted. Picked her up, took her to a hole in the wall diner, ordered the garden omelet. Throughout the meal she talked about all the s**t she was in to. Breath play, being dominated, being hit (but not too hard), whips and cuffs. As Kevin Hart would say, she was getting too kinky too fast. Got the check, realized my wallet was in my gym bag from the night before. I apologized, she paid for us both, and i took her back to her place. She invited me in, and I couldn't refuse as she had just bought me a meal.

An hour later, after the dirtiest sex of my life up to that point, we were lying in bed when she gets a text and panics.

"Oh my god, you have to leave! my boyfriend got off work early and if he finds us he'll kick me out!"

This if the first i'm hearing of a SO, and I realize that I just f**ked a chick on her boyfriend's bed after she bought me breakfast with money he gave her. F**kkkkk. So i throw on half my clothes, jump into my car, and knock over the mailbox in my rush to get the hell out of dodge. When I get home, I see that my rear bumper has a nice new crack.

TL;DR Took girl out for breakfast, forgot wallet, had too-kinky sex, found out she had a long-term boyfriend, damaged my car in my getaway, and now she keeps texting me.

#54

A close friend of mine wanted to set me up on a blind date with a guy, Peter, who her boyfriend worked with. You know, with the same selling line of, "he's so perfect for you and you'll be a cute couple" and truthfully, I was actually excited for my date and got all dolled up despite it being only lunch. I should had known it was gonna suck.

I arrived on time. He arrived half an hour late and didn't even apologized for it. About 10 minutes into our get to know one another interaction, I found out why Peter was single. He believed a woman's only goal in life should be getting pregnant and raising 8.5 kids. Of course, not just any woman is capable of raising his children; she had to be of "good breeding and not be a s***." Women, according to Peter, were destroying this country with their opinions and careers and it was a shame that good, morally upstanding ladies were hard to find.

I was so flabbergasted that I spent a large portion of my time looking for hidden cameras. This was not actually happening was it? I truly believed I was in one of those poorly excuted experiements and my friend was gonna pop out yelling surprise. I even pinched myself. Nope, it was real.

Our waitress interrupted him when he started to go on a rant about the evils of promiscuity, thank god. I think I even might had sent her some "is he crazy?" vibes with my eyes because she gave me a small grimace before leaving our table.

Peter continued on with his tirade, barely letting me get a word in, changing his topics more than we change our underwears in a week. His views sickened me but I was finally done with him when he told me that Asians were only superior to black people by a small margin but both would always be submissive to white people. When he paused to take in a deep breath, I got up, quickly told him, "I'mgoingtothebathroom" before dashing off like a nut out of hell. By the bathroom entrance, I paused to see him loudly talking to a couple near our table, both looking very uncomfortable, without paying any attention to me. I'm not sorry to say that I sacrificed that couple and made a run for the door. The waitress even gave me a small wave goodbye.

After this, I refused to be set on anymore blind dates.

Edit: words and additional info

I love my friend but she doesn't have the best...judgment in people. She and her boyfriend double dated with Peter before so she knew his views on women and people in general. I asked her why she set me up with him and her answer was along the line of, "He's such a nice guy though, he's just been hurt by women before but all he need is a little TLC and before you know it, you'll just love him. Plus he makes SOOO much money and think how nice your children will look." Because him being hot = I turn a blind eye to everything he says.

#55

Guy told me he just recently got out of a long term relationship so he wasn't looking for a commitment but asked me if he could be my "maintenance man" as he stroked his penis through his jeans.

#56

Wasn't necessarily the date, which was bad on its own, but the fact that she hung out in my parking lot for two hours after she dropped me off "incase I changed my mind about doing something after dinner".

#57

The guy decided to drive to a nearly empty parking garage and demand a hand job.

#58

I'm Australian. My profile said I was Australian. First thing that comes out of my dates mouth, "I hate Australians". Didn't last long lol.

#59

Have you ever played frisbee golf when you actually hate frisbee golf? It's like playing fetch with yourself, only it ends up in bushes and s**t and you lose the damn thing every time. I made it to the third hole then I pretended to take interest in some ducks. Still ended up marrying him.

#60

I don't know if this counts as it was two days ...

I knew this guy in high school during Senior year. I thought he was cute but he basically disappeared two months in. Had him on Facebook, still never kept in touch.

Fast forward three years, he messaged me. He was now in the military, but was home on leave. We hung out, and it went really well. He left the next day, but we kept in heavy contact and basically started a long distance relationship within a few months.

I decided to visit him on a long weekend, and this is when it got hairy. He was about four hours away (not awful) and I decided to stay for 3 days. I only stayed for two because I just couldn't stand him. He immediately tried to have sex with me. While that isn't STRANGE when in a ldr, we never had any sexual contact prior and he didn't want to use protection. After I persuaded him to use one and we finished, he grabbed my stomach and said,"Anything you're insecure about here, heh heh?". I almost threw up. The next day, he didn't shower OR brush his teeth before we went out for the day. He was also extremely condescending the whole day. I think it's worth mentioning that he never exhibited this kind of behavior prior.

I chalked it up to serious incompatability and a loss. I drove home early with the excuse of wanting to beat D.C Sunday traffic. He seemed fine with it but on Monday texted me to tell me he just wasn't ready for a relationship. I never answered and we have not spoken since.

#61

The day after I first signed up for OkCupid. I was pretty gung-ho about actually meeting people and had not yet been disillusioned by the whole thing, so when a guy I'd only exchanged 2-3 messages with suggested that we hang out later that night, I was game. He warned me that sometimes people think he's gay when they first meet him. "No problem", I think. I know plenty of people that might be misconstrued as gay for one reason or another (voice, mannerisms, they were in theater in high school...whatever). But it was difficult to make a case for how this dude was anything BUT gay. We met for coffee in the gay neighborhood of an already pretty gay city. His fingernails were painted pink. He asked me if I wanted to go to a gay bar or a straight bar. His three best friends are gay dudes named Sprinkles, Pepper, and Muffin. And he was completely estranged from his family already, so I really didn't understand why he wouldn't just come out.
This was on September 11th, so...the anniversary of September 11th. We wandered around the canals of the rich part of the city and fireworks started to go off. Would have been sooo incredibly romantic if he were straight. And if I were into him.

#62

My first tinder date, this really cute girl. Thought i hit the jackpot. I pick her up at a friend's house, we go to dinner, and she doesnt really know how to talk much in person like she does by text. I tried starting every conversation but nothing worked. During the drive home, she hit me with all this abuse history that her family has done to her. In my head I'm like wtf is going on, i dont even want to get a happy ending at this point, just trying to get home while consoling her verbally. That's until she pulls a knife out of her purse and says, "that's why i always carry this at the bottom of my purse. So dont try anything funny." while giggling with a laugh. I laughed nervously as I slowly accelerated, and took her home. I just gave her a hug and let her get out. good lawd.

#63

Got set up on a blind date once between mutual friends. She shows up to the restaurant already a little tipsy, orders multiple appetizers and only takes like one or two bites from each one. Then she proceeds to order 3 or 4 more drinks and is visibly drunk at this point. She gets up and says she's going to the bathroom and staggers off. About 15-20 minutes go by so I try to call her several times but no answer. Finally I decide to pay the check and just leave. About 2 hours later I'm sitting at home and I get a call from an unknown number. It's the police department. She was picked up on a DUI on her way home after she ditched me and gave the cops my number to see if I could go bail her out!

#64

I was brought up in Poland by Polish parents (university professors) , went to a Polish school, Polish university etc.

Then I had a date with an American man whose grandmother was Polish. He grilled me on the language and criticized my pronunciation and corrected my grammar. This from a guy whose Polish vocabulary was maybe 100 words. He told me I speak like a peasant.

#65

Oh boy finally my time to shine!

I talked to a girl on tinder 8 years ago. She got drunk and told me to come over because her and friends were playing strip poker. I was on overnight duty so sadly I could not partake. 30 minutes later i recieve a picture on my phone that i couldn't even make out. I handed my phone to my roomate and asked if he could figure it out. He says "dude. Thats a butthole." It surely was. She had taken a picture of her butthole from at measly 0.5 inches away and it was so close up i could barely tell what it was. I thought to myself if this is how she leads the rest has to be great! (Spoiler alert: was wrong.)

She tells me we should finally meet next weekend. At applesbees. I meet her there and she looks BEAT. Like she had just run 5 triathalons and been awake for a week straight. Not 3 minutes into meeting and sitting down she says she has to use the restroom. She doesnt come back for 30min+. The waiter comes up and says he has seen her here multiple times and she has been known to shoot up heroin in the bathroom and pass out. Im very not into this at this point but for her own safety i ask if a waitress could peak in the bathroom and see if she is okay. She was not. She OD'd and died. So that was a thing.

TLDR: my tinder date showed me her butthole then OD'd and died at Applebee's.

#66

When I was in college many years ago, before the advancement of cell phones and social media, I was chatting with a girl I met on a BBS who lived on Long Island, NY. I was 18 at the time, but lied and said I was 22 because she said she was 25. We spent a few weeks emailing each other, as well as calling each other. We even exchanged pics. When we finally met up, things blew up. Turns out we both lied about our ages: She was really 33, and lied because she thought she looked younger. She admitted she sent a college photo to me. We still had dinner together, but it was awkward as hell. We never spoke again.

#67

Had a girl openly flirt with the bartender in front of me. She says she wasn’t. But handing him her own phone and asking for his contact info in front of her date seems like it to me.

#68

Blind date. Asked if I wanted to have sushi on our first date. Hell yea! We get there, and as I'm about to order, he tells me not to order too much or anything too expensive. Why you ask? He spent all his money on a new pair of boots for our date. (WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT?) I say I can pay its fine, he refuses and says "nah I can just get some from my mom" (we are in out 20's) ok.

He won't stop talking. The entire night. I check my phone for the time and I'm bombarded by questions as to why I am on my phone. Sorry just checking the time dude. I choke on my water, he keeps talking. Never once stopping to ask if I was ok. BUT YOU NOTICE WHEN I LOOK DOWN AWAY FROM YOU TO CHECK MY PHONE? Lol.

Wouldn't stop talking about his ex. Or as he lovingly referred to her as his "f **k buddy." Ohmygod.

Restaurant is closing. Finally get him to leave. Yay date almost over...

Guy works security at a horse farm in a different county. Wants to take me out to see the horses at 10pm. No? Also, I ride horses, own my own, I know what one f**king looks like, and no I do not want to go see the crazy ass race horses. They're young, stallions, and that's the dumbest idea I've ever heard. He wouldn't leave it alone. Even made the comment "I'm not going to kill you or anything." Yes because that's going to make me want to join you even more now.

Wouldn't end convo out by cars until he got a kiss. He never got a kiss. Got saved by my friend who was getting gas next door who noticed me. THANK GOD BEST SAVE EVER and it wasn't even planned.

Sorry if you're reading this blind date guy.

TLDR: used all his money for dinner on new shoes, kept talking about his "f**k buddy" and tried to kidnap me.

#69

She picked a fight with a construction worker on our train ride home and then pushed me into the guy to defend herself.

Needless to say, the sex was amazing.

#70

The one where I got stood up. She later called and apologized, she said "You were so friggin' handsome and smart and I was just too intimidated."

About as good a reason to get stood up as one could ask for, I guess. Still, wasted 30$ on a theater ticket. The play was hilarious.

#71

I went on a blind date where the restaurant caught on fire, and I slammed her foot in the car door breaking two bones. When your blind date ends at the ER you are going home alone.

#72

Ive been on a lot of bad dates, but here are the first two to pop into my head.

I went on a first date where the dude took my phone and wouldn't give it back, and then bit me when I tried to take it. Left a bruise for a few weeks.

Went on a different first date where the guy's dad died while we were at the movies. Wasn't a bad date necessarily, but the fact that he got a call from his sister telling him there was an emergency sucked. And then not knowing how to console him in the following weeks was tough, I'm bad with loss. I never know what to say or do, especially since we were casual and It was hard to know how to go about everything.

#73

Freshman year, this guy who'd been in a couple of classes said he wanted to take me out on my birthday. He ended up taking me to a "party" at his friends s**tty apartment. Then about five minutes in he tells me he has to go pick something up, but he'll be back really soon.

Two cups of stale keg beer and three hours of awkward small talk later he shows up, high as s**t and tripping balls on a combination of drugs. Completely forgot I was even there. I walked myself home that night.

#74

I was at the cinemas with her and we were watching the notebook. The movie started to get very intimate and i can see at the corner of my eye that she wanted to kiss me. I turned around to see her with her eyes closed moving towards me with her lips 'ready'. I was very nervous because i have never been kissed before so i made an excuse up to 'go to the bathroom'. I didn't even go, I just ran home.

#75

First date, she brought her mother to join us for coffee. The mother was deaf and stared at me the entire time. Apparently lip-reading, I think.

#76

Just the ususal awkward "soo...you want to get married?". Five minutes into

#77

I once meet with a guy at Starbucks, he sat half facing me and never made eye contact...but what he did do was talk extremely loud about how he used to deal drugs in college.

After I left he text me: your booty looked good in that dress.

#78

I invited a girl I was seeing to watch me play hockey for the first time. Ended up breaking my femur. Was in a wheeel chair for 6 months. She dated me. Always felt like a pity relationship.

#79

I got catfished we talked for hours and when it came time to pick her up I CLEARLY saw it wasn’t the person I thought I was talking to… I just gunned it and sped off.

#80

Girl I met online claimed to be 24, turned out to be 16.

Fortunately I figured it out before anything crazy happened but man…talk about dodging a bullet.

#81

He was more than three hours late, and was texting me telling me that he was 20 minutes away for two of those hours. As soon as he arrived he tried to tell me to leave the part of the venue/dive bar I'd already paid in to so we could go where he wanted, tried to start a fight with a friend I'd happened to run into, and called my aunt (who'd talked me into going out with him in the first place) a "cockblocking b****".

I just walked away from him after that last one, and we never spoke again.

--I waited so long because I liked the bands that were playing. I wouldn't have stayed if I was sitting around doing nothing. He got there just before the last band finished, but I'd had about enough of him by then because he'd been telling me that he was on the train in the same place for two hours. We don't live out in the middle of nowhere and he could have easily gotten a bus or tram the rest of the way in that time if there was a problem with the train. He never gave me a proper excuse but I didn't really care at that point.

#82

So I had a terrible date........and it was because of me so this may be a bit biased.

Was in high school, early 2000's. Low-key. Applebee's. He was older than me and I was swooning hard.

Everything was fine. I was nervous as hell and things were going rather smooth for my first official date...until I had to go and choke on f**king water. One of those awful can't breathe situations and then there is literally nothing you can do to take back the veins they saw popping out of your forehead while you desperately tried to cough out the tiniest speck of water that hit your throat the wrong f**king way. Cue me coughing violently, red in the face for about 20 minutes while he sits there (probably terrified out of his wits) asking if I'm ok and have the whole right side of Applebee's staring at me while they sucked down their quesadillas and burger bites. If memory serves correctly, our waiter came up twice asking if I needed anything. I could utter no words, just cough. He had witnessed me at my worst....after I had calmed down any time I so much as breathed audibly, he gave me that look of "Oh God/please don't die again/I have no idea how to help you". I probably felt more embarrassed for him having to put up with this debacle I put on.

When he dropped me off, I had my first kiss. It was cute and I guess that made up for everything. He's married now but that was the worst date I have ever been on.

#83

A guy insisted we go to the drive in movies. Told him he could pick the movie. Cheap bastard picked Paul Blart Mall Cop and told me get in the trunk because he "only brought enough money for one ticket."

I ended up buying both tickets, and he ended up telling everyone I blew him.

#84

Met up with a guy from okcupid. When I met him at the fancy wine bar, he was wearing tatty shorts, t-shirt and flip flops (he picked the bar). I was in heels and makeup and most other guys in the bar were in classy blazers/suits etc so I was a little embarrassed by his clothes but thought well, maybe he isn't very materialistic, maybe that's cool.

Then while we were waiting for our wine to arrive he took the chewing gum out of his mouth and casually put it in the little fancy stone dish of hummus that belonged to the couple at the table next to us. I felt my heart actually skip a beat with embarrassment. (The couple were in the process of switching tables and i guess he thought they abandoned it but the dude was in fact coming back for it at that moment) Other dude (wearing a suit) : "hey what the hell are you doing? " Date guy: (totally chill and cocky) "there's no trash can. What do you expect me to do?"

On the way to the subway, he pointed out a bit of union square he'd had drunken sex on with a previous date.

Next day he texted to say he thought we'd really hit it off and should hang out again. I had to advise him he was incorrect.

#85

Mine wasn't so much a "date" as it was a few days kind of hanging with a guy I met at a bar. Ugh.

Met at bar, we didn't do anything after the bar. I think his friend was interested in my friend that was staying with me, so that worked out. The guy I was hanging with was sweet but a bit off, couldn't put my finger on it.

The next day he came to my apartment and gave me a vcr (this was early 2000's) and some movies that he had purchased at a pawn shop. An odd gift. He told me he couldn't believe I didn't have a vcr. I was in college, wasn't important.

He wanted to borrow money. I can't remember for what.

One night my friend and I were hanging out at my place and he came by. He said he needed to use my phone. He insisted that my friend and I go in my bedroom while he had a private phone conversation. I wasn't having it and told him to use my bedroom, it was my apartment. He continues to have an angry convo with me and the person on the phone. Needs to use the bathroom. For some reason I was looking for my purse and couldn't find it.

Dude storms out of my place, I ask him if he's seen my purse. His reply is, "I didn't take your purse!" Total red flag. He angrily storms out of building. My friend and I are frantically looking for my purse. She finds it... Buried in my cat's litterbox (I find this hilarious now, dude burying my purse in the litterbox). My credit card is missing. I was bawling hysterically, my friend calls Visa for me. She's trying to answer my personal questions so we can cancel the card.

Turns out we caught him as he was trying to get money out and the machine ate my card.

This wasn't the end. Oh no. My friend leaves the next day and goes home. I get a phone call that night from dude saying he is outside my apartment (ground floor, very easy to break in) and he is going to cut me up. I'm scared, I turn off my lights and hide. I call my ex bf to come over, I went to college in a town very far from home and didn't have anyone else to call. Cops get involved. As far as I know he left the province as a warrant went out for his arrest.

What a loser. Thank god I got my s**t together and didn't get involved with people like that again. Yikes.

#86

Girl never showed up. I was stood up. I just moved to the bar and drank and ate buffalo wings.